As discussed in class, this is the post for you to post the following comments:
1. Name at least one thing your partner helped you with in workshop today.
2. What will your next step be in revising/polishing/finishing the essay?
This is Part B of the workshop, and must be completed by 5pm today for full credit. Just click on "comments" below this, and you can post your response.
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17 comments:
1. He helped me make my essay clearer by improving my introduction and making a thesis. Also he gave me ideas on other information to add to the essay, more things to contrast. A conclusion is needed and I need to use chicago formating too.
2. I will first put it in Chicago style and then i will improve my intro and then work on the content of my essay. Last I will add a conclusion.
My partner was super cool. He wears a jacket like me and he was in Bob's writing ACE class last quarter.
I also wear a jacket, but I was not in Bob's ace class last quarter. This is how we compare and contrast. My source is Professor Bob Krut.
He talked to me about refining my ideas into a more cohesive, more organized essay. He also gave me more ideas regarding why my element is addictive and how to incorporate them into my essay.
Next I will reread my research and better set up my essay by explaining both addictions throughly which will provide a better skeleton to work with for my essay.
1. My partner helped me find new ideas to approach my thesis. We brainstormed ideas how to improve and give a clear thesis to the reader. And he also suggested that my essay needs to be more coherent and clearer.
2. Now i will start explaning my ideas in more detail. And improve my thesis.
1. She helped me find new ideas to approach my introduction. We brainstormed ideas how to improve it and give a clear examples to the reader.
2. I will start explaning my ideas in more detail. And improve my thesis. Also to start finishing up my conclusion.
1. My partner helped me a lot. Ester took her time to thoroughly read my paper. She pointed out how my intro needs more work. Also, it appears that I need to add more information about video game overuse.
2. My next step? I don't know about a step. I will be taking numerous steps so that I can make my essay better. I need at least another page and more research about video games.
Ever Romeo Rincon
1. My partner helped me a lot. Ester took her time to thoroughly read my paper. She pointed out how my intro needs more work. Also, it appears that I need to add more information about video game overuse.
2. My next step? I don't know about a step. I will be taking numerous steps so that I can make my essay better. I need at least another page and more research about video games.
Ever helped me clear my thesis up and he made me clear up some of my sentences that were very confusing and not well structured.
the comment above is Esther Cruz
Esther
2) i will go over the revising the my partner gave me and fix my essay and find more research to make my paper stronger.
1. The most helpful thing my partner helped me with was understanding more about my topic and helping thing of a couple more ideas to write about.
2. My next step will be to read over my essay and to work on my introduction and my conclusion
The most important and helpful advice my partner gave me was strengthen my thesis and making the distinctions between Element A and Element B clear.
My next step in revising my essay is researching m ore efficient evidenvce on both addictions.
Even though i was sick and didn't attend class today,Ashley checked my paper for me. She adviced me to work more on my conclusion. She told me to add more information and sum up the whole essay.
I have to find more differences between my two subjects and work on my conclusion.
My partner helped me out getting the right direction for contrasting and comparing sub A and B.
I will rewrite my intro paragraph and find some more sources to strengthen my essay.
1. My partner really helped me organize my essay and fix the grammar errors I had.
2. I plan to use my partner's comments to fix my essay and especially work on my conclusion.
1. My partner really helped me out in giving me suggestions on how to expand on my topic and how to make a better conclusion and intro.
2. I will look over my eassay and work on it.
1. Suggested that i talk about the differences in my additcions more in depth.
2.I am going to fix the on the surface errors(gramar), and then I am going to extend my intro, and the differences between caffein and cocaine addiction.
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